On this week’s episode of What Would YOU Do? we have a question from one of our readers. Really. This isn’t just me saying a “friend” (wink, wink) has a question; this is really a friend with a question.
Our reader wrote:
“My 13-year-old son did not get invited to a birthday party for some girl in his class. Only 15 kids were invited and he didn’t make the cut (but all of his friends did).
Then the girl texted him the day before the party(!) and said, ‘I couldn’t invite too many people but you can come if you want.’
What would you do?”
Hmmm….
My knee-jerk response was, Screw that! Don’t let your kid go. But once I recovered from my Mama Bear reflex, I thought if your kid wants to go to the party, let him go. Give the party girl the benefit of the doubt; maybe she really couldn’t invite a lot of kids.
Now, I would love to believe that I would respond that way if it was my kid but I’m not so sure. Let me tell you a little story about how long I can hold a grudge against someone who hurts my kids, even slightly:
My older son was the only one in his class excluded from a birthday party in preschool.
Preschool!
I’ve disliked the kid who left him out for-ever! My son got over it pretty quickly because – well, he’s a better person than I am. Fast forward 15 years. I recently read that the kid who left out my son and, by the way, talked about the party over-and-over in front of my son, was arrested for selling drugs.
I smiled when I read about that. Karma is a bitch, baby. (Which, given my mean-spirited nature aimed at a pre-schooler, can only mean that I am going to die a fiery, painful death one day. Oh well. Too late).
But I digress.
So, my question for you, dear readers, is:
- What would you advise your kid to do in the above scenario, assuming your kid asks your opinion?
- Is your advice different from what you are really feeling (or am I the only one??)?
Please tell us, What Would YOU Do??
Have a burning parenting question? Want to know how to handle a sticky situation? Let our readers help you figure it out. Send an email with your questions to: isuckasaparent@gmail.com
i suck as a parent 
Posted by Christina Jones on January 15, 2016 at 2:09 pm
My son went through something just like that and he called his friends, who assumed he had been invited and was going, and asked them what he should do, they unanimously said “you should go, dude”. So he went. I ended up being the mom picking 6 boys up at the end of the night and they had a great time. My son wasn’t phased by it. I think the fact that he was naturally encouraged by his friends worked better than any advice I could have given him.
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Posted by I suck as a parent on January 15, 2016 at 2:24 pm
Parents definitely need to follow their kid’s lead. Kids don’t take these things as personally as we parents do, on their behalf. It’s hard as a parent to sit back and watch your kid get left out but, the majority of the time, it works itself out.
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